Yesterday I started typing up a new spaghetti squash recipe during my lunch hour at work when I noticed my MacBook battery started to fail. Since I work near an Apple Store, I made an appointment for 4:30pm and $150 later I had a new battery. Even though it was an expensive purchase, at least my computer was fixed pretty painlessly.

But during my hour drive home, things took a turn for the worst. I was in the right lane, turn signal on, as I was driving through the forest preserve on my way home. At that exact moment, the motorcycle behind me decided to do the same. But he wanted to go first.

In a moment of panic, I turned the wheel back to the right…..and drove right into the guardrail.

The motorcyclist took a quick look back at me and sped off.

The good news is I’m OK. The airbag didn’t deploy. I physically feel fine (so far). But my car wasn’t going anywhere without a tow truck.

Typical Rachel would have freaked out. In fact, typical Rachel did freak out when I blew my tire at 2am in the middle of no-where 2 years ago. At the time, I called my mother hysterical. I remember sobbing on the phone with her and she had my dad call the police and a tow truck for me.

This time, however, it was different. I managed to inch my car out of the main road and into the woods. I calmly opened my glove compartment and found my AAA card. Turns out however, that I don’t have AAA. Apparently my parents cancelled our membership last year.

But I still didn’t panic. I called my insurance company. They arranged a tow, told me it would be 9o minutes and to call the cops.

Here I was, alone in the middle of a forest preserve with no street lights, and no where to go until I was rescued. And as I sat in my car I caught myself wishing things had been different. Why had I tried to switch lanes? Why hadn’t I gone straight home earlier? How could I have been so stupid?

And then I stopped. And I realized, no amount of wishing or hoping or agonizing would change what had happened. So what was the point?

To some of you, this might seem like common sense. But to me it was a turning point. I did finally call my mother, who of course was hysterical. She immediately asked for the phone number of the tow truck so she could scream at them to move faster. And then was ready to call the police after the tow truck dropped me and my car off at the closed repair shop at midnight.

But in my moment of clarity, I stayed calm. I told my mother no amount of screaming would make the tow truck drive faster. And that there was no need for a police escort since I could just call an Uber to come take me home.

I’m still not sure how bad the damage is to my car. The repair shop told me they would call by tomorrow morning. And it turns out my insurance company refuses to pay for the damages, since the motorcycle didn’t physically hit me.

But it is what it is. As the problems keep piling on for once I don’t feel like I’m drowning in them. Maybe this is what it means to be a grownup?

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